Consequences

"O' Lord! Whenever I thought I was prepared and ready and rose to pray, before Your hands, and confided to You, You cast sleep on me when I prayed, and You prevented me from confiding to You when I confided, Why is it that whenever I felt content about the goodness of my core, and my companionships have neared that of the repentants, a sin would occur and cause my feet to stumble, and deprive me from Your service, O' my Master, Maybe You have expelled me from Your door, and retired me from Your service, or maybe You observed my disregard of Your right on me and thus distanced me, or maybe You saw me headed away from (Your path) and thus You withdrew me, or maybe You found me to be in the position of the liars so You rejected me, or maybe You saw that I was not grateful of Your rewards so You deprived me, or maybe You observed my absence from the assembly of the scholars and thus put me down, or maybe You found me to be one of the unheeding so You despaired me from Your mercy, or maybe You found me frequenting the assembly of the unfaithful, so between me and them You deserted me, or maybe You did not like to listen to my prayers so You distanced me, or maybe You equated me with my crime and sin, or maybe You punished me for my lack of shyness from You. So if You forgive, O' Lord, You have forgiven the many sinners before me. For Your generosity, O' Lord, is higher than punishing the delinquents, and I am seeking refuge with Your bountifulness, and I am escaping from You to You, and anticipating Your promise to pardon those who possessed good convictions about You. "

~ Dua Abu Hamza Thumali

One of the many things I love about this blessed month is that for some reason, you are able to put things in better context, and you are able to see a clear map of intentions and thoughts, and how they lead to certain actions, and how those actions lead to certain consequences.  In the numerous supplications and devotions which are recommended to perform in this month, a certain theme stands out pretty obviously: Acknowledgement of the consequences of our actions. Actions committed in disregard of the reality of death, return to Allah and accountability generally end up in sin. Sin leads to a widening gap between us and our Master, which has many effects: from  loss of spiritual peace, to loss of hope and sinking in despair, which then leads to anger against Allah, and more sin… the vicious cycle goes on endlessly.

In order to break the chain of sin, one must try as far as possible to break it from its very roots. Uprooting sin would need to start from the very thought of sin, or allowing your mind to flirt with sin, even for a moment. There then must be a conscious effort to avoid sin, and every time one wants to sin, they should make an extra effort to do extra good, while seeking the help of Allah (swt) in that trial. At the same time, one must ponder upon the sins they have done, and seek sincere repentance for them, while taking every measure to remedy the sins and offenses they perpetrated against others. 

I was thinking about how food and hunger (and talking about the two) are a big part of the shahr Ramadhan culture in our lives today. In this month, we may often feel the pangs of hunger while we are fasting. This is one month in which we deprive our physical selves from nourishment for a few hours, and at the end of the day, we feel the hunger and the need for replenishment. We often force our souls to go hungry for days, weeks, months, perhaps years on end. The dangers is, because we may not “feel” this hunger of our soul, or at least not recognize the symptoms of a starving soul, we do nothing to replenish our souls. Our souls are forced to go hungry, with no spiritual iftaari banquet spread out at the end of the day!

This month, we are able to provide some spiritual nourishment to our starving souls through the words of the Ahlulbayt (as). The words used by them (as) in capturing this feeling of helplessness against our weakness,  the fear and despair of our frequently succumbing to our desires, and its consequences will bring tears to the hardest hearted of people. The way they express hope in Allah, and describe His unending and limitless mercy is beautiful beyond words, inspiring one to change their ways, or to contemplate a serious change in their lifestyles. Question is, for how many people will it bring a real and lasting change? 

May Allah (swt) give us success on His path.